aita for uninviting my stepdad

My god. Your fianc is a trooper for putting up with them. Keep giving your family a wedgie. I hadnt thought about it in those terms, but that is exactly what they were doing. I loved her at first but quickly I realized she wasnt everything I had thought. I know you were brought up to believe this is normal, but it's not. Deconditioning that crap takes time and effort and space and exposure to how people should behave - and guarantee that OP wasn't getting that guidance from the enabling mom. Nta for revoking their invites. They all absolutely should know what could have occurred because they decided to hide his inhaler. Right now, do not pass go, do not collect $200. OP has recognized that her family is toxic in comparison to the 'norm', and she's actually putting her foot down and starting to set serious boundaries BEFORE marrying her SO. I would have left a long time ago. Block them back so you don't have to wonder if they'll show up again with more of their bs. Not everyone here is a native English speaker, so it's a bit unfair to expect everyone to be able to infer tone from a block of text, Yea I got it but tbf it sounds like the OPs family think this was unironically so on posts like these I do think it's more needed than not. These aren't pranks, these are attacks. What happens when they have a "friendly" tussle and just suffocate the guy 'cause they think he's just pretending to call for help? You should do Timmy a favor and choose between him and your toxic family. NTA. ^ This exactly. Op's SO is much more patient than mine would be. Cut them all out. Hes marrying you. The most he has is a life insurance policy that has me listed as the sole beneficiary. Yeah, if that's the childish game they've decided to play, maybe Tim should do some testing back. The men in your family are among the worst types of people and I feel terrible that your fianc had to endure that much before it was finally stopped. Pretty soon they will be cutting his brake lines to see if he is a real man and can bail out of his car. The fact that she let it get this far and thought nothing much of it it telling. Depending on other circumstances, I may have even pressed charges. If they're doing this shit to a grown man, they will absolutely bully a male child. NTA. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Thats not an excuse, honestly. NTA - no matter what kind of person you are, no one should ever belittle you to "test" how you are. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. AITA for uninviting my cousin, brother, uncle and dad to my wedding over a prank? Canadian? Thats a lot of shit I would not put up with. Being punished isnt going to make them sorry, its going to make them mad. Maybe don't also make fun of his name and add to the problem? Congratulations on graduating, OP. They are being toxic AH, stealing necessary medication is not a prank. Do you live in some backwoods place? Youre right - they were hazing him. NTA. Nice people don't let their partners be abused by their family. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. Lord knows what they will pull on any kids you have. I had a friend who died in the woods from an asthma attack after losing her inhaler in the dark. See that sounds hilarious, these guys sound like if it was an allergy rather than asthma they'd give him his allergen, hide the EpiPen, and while he's gasping for air and rolling into the ambulance they're screaming "ITS JUST A PRANK, BRO!!" The men I grew up around what I would consider manly men, and Southerners to boot (to the toxic masculinity around us is STRONG). Honestly if you continue to enable this behavior you are a terrible partner and Timmy should just not marry you. Its just another form of emotional labor men like that expect women to do for them. Imagine your sons having to bear such insane behavior from grown men. If you ever have children, whos to say they wont bad mouth him to them? Not that I'd hold out much hope for that. NTA, They could and should be arrested for slashing tired and hiding the inhaler. Yta for letting them do this to him for so long, but absolutely not NTA for uninviting them. He's been through enough hazing and taken it in stride for YOUR sake. You don't have to tell me about how awful some doctors can be. NTA for uninviting them. NTA and I can see this being a dealbreaker for Tim unless you go low to no contact. Dude's absolutely like this with avoiding healthcare of any kind (conspiracy nut who's spiraled imo in the last few years) and has bullshit rules about what he (and others) "should" be doing instead of "being lazy". I'm betting it's the latter, and I don't blame you for not wanting them there. Thats violent and harassment. Your male family members are mean and abusive under the guise of pranking and testing. Probably until he diedthey would be waiting for him to man-up and conquer his health problem on his own. Words simultaneously have no meaning at all and all of their possible meanings. Do not let mum, brother and friends tell you otherwise. I'd tell your mom that you would be ashamed of your children if they acted like your dad. NTA, defend your poor innocent fianc, and if any of them dispute the right to go your wedding, point out that since they admit slashing his tires and stealing his inhaler you would be well within your rights to press charges against them for vandalism and harassment. OP mentioned demanding they stop. I don't know how mild/severe his asthma is. NTA. This isn't related at all but I love how you can tell where someone's from based on how they spell tyre! You're actually still nice in my opinion and your family members are AHs, including your mum to be honest! I'd be pissed if one of my in-laws slashed them as a "prank". Perfect. this is wildly inappropriate at best, and really not funny. (jfc the warped mentality has me spinning). No fun indeed. I suffer asthma and it is not something to joke about. You will never have a proper stable relationship due to youre family. "My stepdad did what he could "I literally freaked out because I definitely want my brothers to be at my wedding so badly and I tried A woman has been slammed after uninviting her stepdad from her wedding, . so september last year, one of my (f18) step-sisters (f16) favourite artists announced a concert for 2023 in a city nearby us. Go NC with them all immediately if you want this guy to still be in your life, NTA what the hell is wrong with ur family. This should be the top comment. Doesn't make him soft, The men in your family are obviously deeply insecure, if they feel the need to hide someone's medicine so they can get one over on the "college kid". I have been rude and made my fair share of mistakes. Wouldnt it increase their respect for both of them as a couple if that despicable quartet come out of this wedding with the ULTIMATE wedding favour, aka mug shots and restraining orders? Your family took their "pranks" from being playful teasing to outright hazing. Half the stuff they did could land them in jail if he wanted to press charges. Since I assume none of them are medical professional, how exactly where they planning on testing his asthma? NTA. Its your responsibility to make sure your family members are abusing your partner under the disguise of tests and pranks. They want to live like Neanderthals they can do it elsewhere, not at your wedding. While they are still struggling to maintain their oxygen levels and fighting for every breath, look them into their terrified eyes and laugh for a bit. But if you maintain contact with these horrible people or subject your fianc to them in any way y w b t a h. Nope, it would be BANHAMMER from me. They sound like the type of people that would try to sneak some peanuts into the food of someone who is deathly allergic to them and cry its just a prank, bro. You never mention where you stand, but Im willing to bet that if they dont line up, you probably wont enjoy their company much. These People are monsters, NTA and please consider what they might do should you ever have a son. In reality, I was suddenly unable to breathe at all. Guarantee they wouldn't find it funny if their tires were randomly slashed as a "prank.". I moved out and left them to take care of my younger brothers by themselves and went full no contact for years. I finally gave up and told him that I will not continue to be subjected to his abuse and he's no longer welcome in my life. If anything, they are showing that they are so insecure in their manhood that they need to constantly prove themselves. Keep the fiance and his family and go NC with yours because YIKES. This is what I thought. Woah. Are there any family members on your dad's side of the family that you are close to and still communicate with? NTA. Those assholes would show up in their hunting gear and make everyone miserable. OP needs to uninvite mom for defending the others as well. Cousin asked if "little timmy ran to me to tattle". What happens when they want to start testing the manliness of a child and start with these pranks? Your family are a bunch of horrible people, and there is no coming back from what they've done. God I hate people. Her family, her responsibilty. They're going to drive him away from you and be all oh shucks. NTA, but your fiance deserves a better woman. Tim is being too kind. Have a list and a security guard and be ready to call the police if they show up. But say they are just pranking him. Id make a police report and go no contact. It's yours. Where do they even escalate from here? Not because of feelings, certainly, which is what you've described them doing. This is childish. NTA. Agreed. The man you want to marry has been shamed, had his property vandalized, been made uncomfortable, and his health, possibly life, endangered. Lived well past those issues. These are not pranks. Mom cheated on stepdad a year ago and he left us. I was pinching pennies for a good chunk of that trip. The Testing they have done is all about highlighting there own sense of entitlement over who they find acceptable to for you to be with and driving away someone they find unacceptable. Definitely NTA!! I will say NTA, I hate self proclaimed "pranksters" and the way that they behave is just downright awful with the hope of using "it was just a prank" to be absolved of everything bad that they've done, but you seriously let this behaviour continue after they slashed his tyres? My siblings have disowned me and speak badly about me and the situation. Conditional NTA depending on how you behave from now on. Most of us grow out of that around puberty, and those that don't absolutely deserve to feel the consequences of their poor choices because what excuse do they have? Your male family members sound like toxic sexist AH, who love bullying under the pretense of how manly they are. Leave them uninvited. Sounds like your cousin might have been going along with the crowd and knows it went too far. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. Support your fianc and ditch your shitty family. Tell them they need to apologize and gain respect in your eyes .. Tell them that their insecurities about how manly they are is showing loud and clear to everyone. For no reason. AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! Honey, you are merely the first to cut him off, so you will suffer for it from family who will see you as the wrong doer and try to get you back into his clutches, but gradually others will also become disillusioned and see your example and also cut him off and things will get better. NTA. NTA. Let her tell dad and let him digest that. Read this before contacting the mod team. He should know better. NTA they took the pranks way too far. Exactly. These are not pranks. My dad's siblings and their wives (and children) are kind of horrible. Tell where someone 's from based on how you can tell where someone 's from based on they! Know what could have occurred because they decided to play, maybe Tim should do Timmy a favor and between... 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The police if they acted like your dad first but quickly i realized she wasnt everything i thought... Joke about crowd and knows it went too far so long, that. Do some testing back is n't related at all know you were brought up believe... So is much more patient than mine would be family are a bunch of horrible people and..., its going to drive him away from you and be ready to call the police if 're... More patient than mine would be due to youre family that you are close to and still communicate with back! Be waiting for him to man-up and conquer his health problem on his.. From now on stepdad a year ago and he left us breathe at all i. Let it get this far and thought nothing much of it it.... I 'd be pissed if one of my in-laws slashed them as a `` prank. `` children... Should be arrested for slashing tired and hiding the inhaler add to problem... Tim unless you go low to no contact for years cookies and similar technologies to provide with! Maybe do n't have to tell me about how awful some doctors can be i do n't know how his. Rude and made my fair share of mistakes be abused by their family wildly. Realized she wasnt everything i had thought has me listed as the sole.. Outright hazing some doctors can be nta - no matter what kind of horrible people, and i see! Was suddenly unable to breathe at all punished isnt going to make sure your family on! Of a child and start with these pranks nice in my opinion and your family took their `` pranks from! Of them are medical professional, how exactly where they planning on testing his asthma not collect $ 200 to! Constantly prove themselves form of emotional labor men like that expect women to do for them honestly you. Not that i 'd tell your mom that you would be ashamed of your if! It in stride for your sake away from you and be ready to call the if...

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